funny poetry for kidsAny 3

My kid needs a 3 to 5 minute poem for her class and she really wants it funny btw shes in 6th grade :/
Not sure if you needed an original poem or not, so heres one I thought was super cute that I heard some time ago

The Case of the Missing Cookies

I'm taking my parents to court
to prove I'm an innocent kid.
The judge will most surely agree
that they're wrong about what I did.

Just because all my fingers were sticky
and 拙克力 was on my face,
doesn't mean I stole those cookies.
So there! I rest my case.

What's that you say, you need more proof?
I have an alibi.
When the cookies got stolen, I was outside.
Now I ask you, why would I lie?

You have no witnesses on your side;
just circumstantial lies.
I think the real crook snuck inside
in a masterful disguise.

Maybe he was disguised as me.
I really cannot say.
All I know is I did not
steal any cookies that day.

Now judge, I ask for sympathy,
so please instruct the jury
to say that I'm not guilty
(and to say it in a hurry!)

My folks are looking quite annoyed
that I've taken things this far.
But it's not as if they caught me
with my hands in the cookie jar.

The jury's back, the verdict's in.
Guilty?! That can't be!
I gathered all the evidence
that should have setfunny poetry for kids me free.

Where did I go wrong, and now
what will my sentence be?
Three years of washing dishes, no!
No way! They can't mean me!

The next time I take my parents to court
(though I doubt it will be in my youth)
I'll make sure that what I'm saying
is actually the truth.
Clumsy Might

To start off right..His name was Joe Might..
Kids laughed at his mistakes.
But what they never realized was that Joe had backaches..
He would moan and groan..and scare all in sight..
because his back was craving ice..
Yet everytime he received it, ice would burn his back..
He wondered why this was happening??
Why had this ice turned hott???
Why was his back scorching hott and why did the kids laugh extremely hard his way??
He wondered this for days till sun rise hoping to get a cue..
When MR/MRs..______*nurse* came in the room, right then she knew..
Joe had been playing with dry ice again and his back was just about through.
The nurse rushed him to the hospital claiming it was a check-up.
The boy was pleased to be released by a grownup.
He didnt care the real reason as long as he was out of school.
But what he didnt realize was teach was having a ball.
They had cakes and pies and soda pop too..
Ice cream, milk, and real ice this time.
Mikeyfunny poetry for kids Behave was round as a bowling ball and could eat a ton.
So you know what he did... He left a mess in the hall..
After stealing all the cakes and pies, Mikey got sick and ate some ice cream to ease the pinch
He decided that wasnt enough and went for more..Starting with the milk straight from the carton and soda pop mixed in all..
When Joe got back from the hospital
patched up well and ready to have fun
The others were on a rampage, ranting not for joy.
All their food was gone and they were pissed..
They hadnt eaten all day since breakfast and they were starving..
They used those emotions into confronting Mikey for their side dish
Joe broke up the fight and said stop this nonsense..
I came back with mr/ms. nurse//and my back stopped aching..
The kids looked at Joe and said Thats nice..but Who are you??
Joe saw some ice in a corner and picked it up to say...I am Joe Might...
In that moment he soon remembered why he burnt his back: to make a point as to who he was to the class.. and dropped the ice in the same way previously..scorching his back and re-injuring his back scar....


THE END...

HAHAH now wasnt that funny and nice
hope ya like it

homework questions and answersWhen did yahoo answers become a forum for lazy children to get their homework questions answered?

and how often do you find the other questions they've asked are about how you can get away w/texting each other answers for tests in school? What ever happened to learning for yourself?
I was wondering the same thing. It amazes me how many home work questions are asked on here.

I wish they would take the time to take notes and go over them and re-read their books. Also, please get tutoring if you need it. You are never going to learn anything if you do not study and put an effort!!
Sometimes the students do study, listen in class, and take good notes it's just that there's sometimes way to many crap on their plates. School is tough and overwhelming for some but whining about how Y/A is a bunch of lazy kids isn't really going to solve anything, plus there's like 50+ threads...

people are too lazy, dont want to go to study groups, dont want to pay attention in class, so when its crunch time, they panic and ask strangers to do their question for them
It's always been like that. Check out the physics section once in a while. It really annoys me when they can't even be bothered to take the numbers off the questions, or rephrase them so it's not completely obvious that it's homework. Someone even posted their entire fihomework questions and answersnal in the astronomy section today. Fortunately most of the posters there are more likely to mock and scold them than do it for them.

Your question got me thinking. I did some googling and found no less than 3 sites that will write your PhD thesis for you in it's entirety , it's the parents who let their children use the pc anyway they want. They could be watching porn as well...
i partly agree with you. on the texting for answers and what not. but most of the time when they put a question up about help for homework, i think it's because they need help with it.

take me for example, i a senior in high school,
and my parents didn't go to college, my dad didn't even finish high school, when i need help with homework they can't help me, and all of my friends parents are about the same way, i work after school a lot and i am unable to stay after for school for help, and sometimes i think i understand the assignment and then i get home and there seems to be a couple of questions that don't really make sense, so if they put it up on here maybe someone can explain it , or help them get to the right answer.
hmmmmm.when did it start?
ever since the idea of "forum" began.

it would be much better if the people who answer it actually give explanations, ahomework questions and answersnd not just the answer per se.
It's kinda like what Vegeta7_99 said, "people are too lazy". They either don't want to do it or feel that it's a waste of time that could be spent on things that they think is important. Because of that, they put off whatever assignment it is until the last minute when it's actually due.

But not everyone uses Yahoo answers to get "freebies" for their homework. Some of those folks out there might actually need help but are unable to get a hold of a teacher or someone that'll lend a hand at the time.

It's very saddening that stuff like that is happening. But what these kids don't realize is that by doing that, they don't learn anything. So when it comes time to apply the knowledge they supposedly learned, they won't be able to do it. As for those that were actually taught better than most but still choose to do stuff like that, not really sure what to say....
People are too lazy to do their own work themselves. instead of clarifying their doubts they go the easy way and post a question. And some of us readily answer so as to earn points. Fault lies in all of us.
i think i don`t know

conversation datingAny good or fun dating conversation ideas?

I've been dating, talking on the phone and texting this girl for like three weeks and sometimes I have no idea what to say. I don't want her to think i'm just all physical. I wanconversation datingt to get to know her better, but I suck at conversation. Any good or fun ideas?
haha, crack a joke. any joke, and shell laugh, and might start a converstaion. girls have just as mconversation datinguch trouble. dw, as u guys get to know eachother more then youll have more things to talk about. haha, good luck :)

sneeze in your sleepCan you sneeze in your sleep?

Not a sneeze in your dream, but a sneeze you would normally do while awake.
My husband does it all the time and he can cough in his sleep and talk in his sleep...
He is a barrel of fun when I am trying to sleep...
Thanks a bunch...

sneeze in your sleep
maybe, not a known fact
Yeah, but I think it'd probably wake you up.
Sure you can- sneezing is caused by an irritation in the nasal passages (I think) they can be irritated while you are sleeping.
you can even walk while sleeping, lol, once i dreamedsneeze in your sleep i was fighting and i was boxing in the air, my mom told me :PPP
Dear, consult a doctor; dad had this problem and his doctor prescribed him an effective medication.
Don't do as mistaken others do by asking for opinions in such health related issues.
no

disney jonas brothersHow can i get into the music side of disney? Jonas brothers/demi lovato/ that stuff.?

I want to persue my musical career, i am 14, and i know i have looks to go into the disney channel entertainment, and some of the songs that i have put togethers are great, I can play guitar, drums, ukulele, but my one flaw is my voice, which i know could be fixed. How can i get to even talk to disney about this?
seriously, if you wanna get into the music industry don't go Disney, Disney is a joke, people there have no real talent, everyone in Disney eventually ends up in "music". once you get into Disney that's how people are gonna keep seeing you, as the Disney character who is forced to act in a specific way for as long as they've got you in there. Try somewhere else, start disney jonas brotherswith karaoke night, school talent shows, pubic events, get some practice and call up and agency, who knows? you might just make it
Okay, so you say you want a career in music. Why do you want to go to Disney?
I'm not saying that Disney is a bad place to be, admittedly people there end up being immensely popular - but also hated. Think about it, Miley Cyrus has way more people hating her than liking her, and her fanbase is pretty much 100% tween girls who wouldn't know real music if it ran them over in a car.
My advice? Get singing lessons! If you know it can be fixed, it doesn't have to be fixed by the likes of Disney. Once you've got your voice how you want it, start. Perform in talentdisney jonas brothers shows, audition for musical theatre productions, audition for commercials and maybe small TV parts. I know these aren't all necessarily music, but once you're in showbusiness it's easy to venture into other parts of it - ie. music!
Have fun! :)
Make your portfolio thing with your headshots & resume, then you should probably send it to them. If they're interested, they'll probably contact you.
Otherwise, look into open auditions and things. (:
Good luckk.
If you want to get into Disney then you don't need a voice. If you want to be anything like someone like Miley Cyrus all you need is an editing software.

rock with you song lyricsWhat is the classic rock song with lyrics change you'll play it again x3?

I heard this song on my classic rock station and the only thing I picked up was the chorus sounded like the lyrirock with you song lyricscs said changes, you'll play it again, you'll play it again, you'll play it again...
I think you mean "Jane&qurock with you song lyricsot; by Jefferson Starship.


Love that song! :)

covalent molecular compoundsWhat are some examples of Covalent Network and Covalent Molecular Compounds?

I found you a link where you can get some ecovalent molecular compoundsxamples.

there is a jav that lets you crcovalent molecular compoundseate structures such as diamond.
Good luckcovalent molecular compounds.